170+ Funniest Ricky Bobby Quotes from Talladega Nights

Ricky Bobby quotes from Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby are a hilarious mix of bold confidence, Southern charm, and absurd wit. Delivered by Will Ferrell, Ricky Bobby’s lines have become iconic in pop culture, from “If you ain’t first, you’re last” to “I wanna go fast!” These quotes aren’t just funny—they also capture the over-the-top spirit of competition and American racing culture. Whether you’re laughing at his prayers to baby Jesus or his wild racing philosophy, Ricky Bobby quotes are unforgettable and endlessly quotable. They bring humor, inspiration, and a whole lot of attitude to any conversation.

Ricky Bobby Quotes

“I wanna go fast!”
“Shake and bake!”
“Help me, baby Jesus!”
“I’m the best there is, plain and simple.”
“I piss excellence.”
“Don’t you put that evil on me, Ricky Bobby!”
“I’m just a big hairy American winning machine.”
“It’s the fastest who gets paid.”
“You can’t have two number ones.”
“Drive it like you stole it.”

Best Ricky Bobby Quotes

“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“I’m not sure what to do with my hands.”
“Dear Lord Baby Jesus…”
“I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.”
“You gotta win to get love. That’s just the way it is.”
“This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons.”
“I don’t know what to do with my hands!”
“That just happened!”
“Magic man… now you see me.”
“El Diablo, it’s Spanish for ‘fighting chicken.'”

Ricky Bobby Quotes Funny

“I’m high on Mountain Dew!”
“Like a spider monkey!”
“With all due respect… I said with all due respect!”
“I threw a bunch of Grandpa Chip’s war medals off the bridge!”
“That’s not my fault! I was high when I said that!”
“I’m gonna come at you like a spider monkey, Chip!”
“He’s not a thinker. He’s a driver!”
“You sound like a dog with peanut butter on the roof of your mouth.”
“I’m paralyzed!”
“Is that a catchphrase or epilepsy?”

Famous Ricky Bobby Quotes

“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“Shake and bake, baby!”
“Help me Tom Cruise!”
“I wanna go fast!”
“I don’t know what to do with my hands.”
“I’m Ricky Bobby, and I piss excellence.”
“Winning’s the only thing I love.”
“The car handled real good.”
“Like a bullet from a gun!”
“I’m not a thinker, I’m a racer.”

Ricky Bobby Quotes – “If You Ain’t First”

“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“Second is just the first loser.”
“First place or no place.”
“It’s first… or forget it.”
“Ain’t no glory in second.”
“Silver’s just shiny losing.”
“Top spot or bust!”
“Go big or go home.”
“I didn’t come to finish behind.”
“First is forever. Last is forgotten.”

Ricky Bobby Quotes Inspirational

“You gotta win to get love.”
“Be the fastest. Be remembered.”
“You control your own destiny.”
“Shake and bake—teamwork wins.”
“No fear, just speed.”
“If you believe, you go faster.”
“Drive through the fear.”
“Keep your foot on the gas.”
“Live fast, win fast.”
“Confidence is horsepower.”

Ballad of Ricky Bobby Quotes

“Shake and bake!”
“Magic man… now you see me.”
“That just happened!”
“Like a spider monkey!”
“Dear 8-pound, 6-ounce newborn baby Jesus…”
“I’m not sure what to do with my hands.”
“I wanna go fast!”
“Help me, Oprah Winfrey!”
“Slingshot—engaged!”
“I’m a winner! That’s how I was made.”

Ricky Bobby – “I Wanna Go Fast” Quotes

“I wanna go fast!”
“Speed is in my blood.”
“Fast is freedom.”
“If I’m not racing, I’m not living.”
“Born to go fast!”
“Speed me up, Scotty!”
“Slow is a sin.”
“The pedal’s down for a reason.”
“Don’t brake till you see God.”
“Faster, always faster.”

Talladega Nights Ricky Bobby Quotes

“Shake and bake, baby!”
“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“I’m just a big hairy American winning machine.”
“Help me, baby Jesus!”
“Like a spider monkey!”
“Magic man!”
“I’m not sure what to do with my hands.”
“Dear Lord, please help me win.”
“You can’t have two number ones.”
“Slingshot engaged!”

Will Ferrell Ricky Bobby Quotes

“I piss excellence.”
“I wake up winning.”
“I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo T-shirt.”
“I’m Ricky Bobby. And if you don’t chew Big Red… then f*** you.”
“I’m too drunk to taste this chicken.”
“Did that blow your mind?”
“You can’t teach speed.”
“I’m the best there is, plain and simple.”
“I love crepes now!”
“Drive fast, eat last.”

Ricky Bobby – “I Wake Up in the Morning” Quotes

“I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.”
“I wake up knowing I’ll win.”
“I wake up, say grace, and go fast.”
“Every morning starts with speed.”
“I rise, I race.”
“Wake up. Win again.”
“Morning = go time.”
“Eyes open, engines on.”
“Sun’s out, gas pedal down.”
“I don’t sleep—just recharge.”

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby Quotes

“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“Shake and bake!”
“Help me, Tom Cruise!”
“I wanna go fast!”
“I’m on fire! I’m on fire!”
“You gotta learn to drive with the fear.”
“Drive like you’re being chased!”
“He’s not a thinker, he’s a driver!”
“That just happened!”
“I’m Ricky Bobby!”

Ricky Bobby Quotes on Winning

“I’m a winner—that’s how I was made.”
“Winning is living.”
“Second place is the first loser.”
“I don’t lose, I learn fast.”
“If I ain’t winning, I ain’t trying.”
“Winners make the rules.”
“You win or you’re invisible.”
“First across the line is all that matters.”
“Winning is everything.”
“Born to win. Bred to race.”

Ricky Bobby – First or Last Quotes

“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“There’s only one podium spot that matters.”
“First or forget it.”
“No one remembers second.”
“Top only. No in-between.”
“First place—nothing else exists.”
“First, fast, fearless.”
“I only do #1.”
“Win or vanish.”
“First is forever. The rest is noise.”

Ricky Bobby Quotes – Second Place

“Second place is first loser.”
“Who remembers second?”
“Silver? Nah, I only wear gold.”
“Second is for the slow.”
“You came second—congrats on losing.”
“You didn’t win, you almost did.”
“Try harder next time.”
“Second means try again.”
“Loser with a trophy.”
“Second’s just a better view of first.”

Great Ricky Bobby Quotes

“Shake and bake!”
“I piss excellence.”
“Help me, baby Jesus!”
“I wanna go fast!”
“With all due respect…”
“I’m on fire!”
“Slingshot—engaged!”
“I wake up and dominate.”
“I’m not sure what to do with my hands.”
“You ain’t first, you’re last!”

“If You Ain’t First, You’re Last” Quotes

“It’s first place or no place.”
“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
“No glory in second.”
“Champions finish first.”
“You either win or you vanish.”
“First defines you.”
“Last means you didn’t try hard enough.”
“Win big or stay home.”
“You remember the winners.”
“I live by one rule—be first.”

Ricky Bobby Meme Quotes

“I wanna go fast!”
“I’m not sure what to do with my hands.”
“Help me, Tom Cruise!”
“I wake up and piss excellence.”
“If you ain’t first, you’re last!”
“Shake and bake!”
“I’m on fire!”
“Dear tiny baby Jesus…”
“That just happened!”
“I love crepes now!”

Conclusion

Ricky Bobby quotes continue to entertain and inspire fans with their unique blend of comedy and confidence. Whether he’s declaring his love for speed, wrestling with humility, or just being wildly inappropriate, Ricky Bobby delivers every line with memorable energy. These quotes have become more than just movie lines—they’re part of pop culture, embraced by racing fans, comedy lovers, and anyone who enjoys a little outrageous motivation. In the world of Ricky Bobby, going fast isn’t just a desire—it’s a way of life. And let’s be honest, we all need a little “shake and bake” in our day.